I am a firm believer that 1st February, St Brigid's Day, Imbolc, my Birthday, is the start of Spring. For a couple of weeks now it has been much sunnier with beautiful clear blue skies. But with the increased sunlight AND daylight, we have seen a drop in temperatures. I just came back from a few hours in the park and my fingers are literally numb, but it was so worth it to see things like this:
This photo speaks to me on so many levels. It shows me how very blue the sky is. How beautiful the blossom is. Reminds me that my pregnancy is in full bloom. Reminds me that my upcoming birthday signals the start of Spring. The pinky purple colour of those buds is the exact colour I see in my mind when I visualise my baby girl. That is the tone, the note, the volume, the panetone, the pitch, the "whatever you call it" that I associate with her essence.
Just like the blossom is born, so too will be my girl. My BABY girl. Oh my God the day has really come. I will have a daughter.... but then since her very conception I have already had a daughter and certainly 120 days from conception, her soul has been earthside, body bound inside me!
Little lady, you are mine and I am yours.
I need to let go of the fear and start channeling all of the love of the universe into my bump for your safe arrival. We can do this.
You are but a bud, but so soon you will become my flower:
I've just spent nearly 4 hours in the park and yes my fingers went numb, but I never tired of walking around carrying the weight of you. Despite only 3 hours sleep last night, today I am feeling vital. Me, Daddy and Aaron are all increasingly excited about meeting you.
It's like you are on a train, destination HERE. Except, as with Aaron you are already here. With Aaron, Daddy felt like we went to hospital without a baby, and came back with Aaron. But this time, I think he knows, since April that you are here. You are always here. We talk about you every day. Already we are a family of four.
December Aaron had two advent calendars and everyday as a result he ALWAYS knew how many sleeps it was till Christmas. He has measured January in exactly the same way, with the same intent, with the same excitement. Meeting you is as important as gifts from Santa. He was born to be a sibling. Such a good big brother you already have my sweetheart.
I just hope he is not too lost or bereft whilst I am in hospital but I am trying my hardest to ensure the right people are in place to make sure he feels safe, secure and happy whilst Mummy and Daddy are temporarily busy getting you out my darling.
So, all I can say is see you soon. Bye for now,