The Gallery - Inspirational Women

God took you quick because you were ready
You'd learned all there was to know

Once you'd spent some time with all whom you loved
He knew it was time to go

*

Your time on Earth, it was always precious
Lived life with a vigour that's rare

Your smile's everlasting, your memory alive
Our feelings we've all laid bare

*

We'll all soon be going to an event that you loved
A conference you would not have missed

But don't you worry you won't be forgotten
Your name's already on the list

*

You won't have a name badge nor a goody bag
We won't see you for real on the day

But thanks to computers the ones that you loved
Your image will come alive that way

*

So you see, you'll still be there, in a way
that's as real as the memories that we all share

We'll never forget you or what you taught us
Because we all still care

*

So you'll always be with us, inspired we remain
For you were a shining light

When an angel lives upon this earth
The star that twinkles is BRIGHT!



Linking up with Prose for Thought

Today - 4th January 2013 - Multiple Mummy's Thanksgiving Service #KerryInOurHearts

I never dreamed that a thanksgiving service could do Kerry justice.

But then I ought to have known that with Kerry being the very best of people, she surrounded herself with the best, and came from the best stock.

That was so evident today.

Being an Irish Roman Catholic, being in church is not new to me, but being in a church, such as I was today, WAS new to me.

I have quite frankly never known anything like it.

The ceremony opened with us listening to this: A Little Fall of Rain.

That was the beginning of many a tear being shed.

Then the priest spoke. I have met many a priest, but none as humble, as eloquent, as heartfelt as THIS one. He had met Kerry several times, and it showed. He had baptised the twins. He had led Kerry in her belated "Confirmation" course which she was half way through when she fell ill (I couldn't help but reflect on the fact that I have also never been confirmed). He said that during the sessions on the course, where she was surrounded in young people, he let her take the lead, as she explained things like "faith" way better than he could. I have never met such a humble priest. All of the people she would have been confirmed with have signed a bible, which will now be treasured by the family.

We later sung "lord of the dance" which I have always thought of as an upbeat hymn but when you try to sing it, there is a certain paragraph that chokes you in tears.

Then her Dad spoke, and really brought her memory alive with his tales. Again, humbling in the extreme, how heartfelt and eloquent he was. He was so so strong and she would be proud to have seen how he spoke and what he said. What really is beautiful is that his faith is still intact and he waits to get an explanation for his loss. This was the first time we heard that Kerry did not like walking, even having to be tempted to walk as a baby by following a trail of chocolate buttons (the beginning of a life spent loving chocolate cold and hot). Nick her husband also alluded to her aversion for walking by saying their family walks had to be short :-)

Nick was next to speak, and took us on a journey of emotions, where we got such a treasured insight into their life. Nobody could quite believe how he managed to honour her, yet be jovial too. I don't think there's an emotion that exists that he did not touch upon, such was the extent of the reach of his speech. He made a lot of people proud today. He explained how Sandra her Mum did a vigil every day by her bedside for 5 long months. Back in happier times they spoke every day on the phone for hours. I could see her from where I was sitting, and she enjoyed hearing tales of their love for one another.

We thought we couldn't possibly feel any more pain, and then we were played Have I Told You Lately by Rod Stewart (their first dance song from their wedding).

One of the lines is "you take away all my sadness" and Nick in his speech got choked, when he said she is not here to do that for him today. But Nick, Kerry will ALWAYS be by your side now, as a Guardian Angel.

Amy read 1 Corinthians 13 which was truly beautiful, and like the priest, and Kerry's Dad and Nick, she was so poised and together; eloquently and beautifully spoken.

I didn't think we could possibly feel any more emotions, and then Kerry's beautiful Sister read this poem which I had never heard of before, but I think you will agree is so very apt for Kerry:

Instructions
A Poem by Rev. Arnold Crompton

When I have moved beyond you in the adventure of life,
Gather in some pleasant place
And there remember me with spoken words,
old and new. Let a tear fall if you will,
but let a smile come quickly
For I have loved the laughter of life.

Do not linger too long with your solemnities,
Go eat, and drink, and talk
And when you can -
Follow a woodland trailClimb a high mountain
Sleep beneath the starsSwim in a cold river
Chew the thoughts of some book that challenges your soul
Use your hands some bright day
to make a thing of beauty.
Or to lift someone’s heavy load.

Though you mention not my name,
Though no thought of me crosses your mind-
I shall be with you
For these have been the realities of life to me.
And when you face some crisis with anguish -
When you walk alone with courage
When you choose your paths of right
When you give yourself in love
I shall be very close to you.
I have followed the valleys,
I have climbed the heights of life.

Being that all of the Christmas decorations are still up, and Kerry loved Christmas we then all sang Silent Night. Nick did not need to do Christmas Stockings for his 3 children as Kerry had them organised by June 2012. Apparently she starts organising Christmas Day on Boxing Day - she continues to amaze me!

Before we left the Church, we remained in our seats to listen to this: The Calling - Wherever You Will Go.

The family remained outside the Church so that we could offer our condolences. We also joined them at the Greyhound pub for a drink.

I was so very glad that 7 of us made it to the ceremony. We all held each other up.

Annie, Mammasaurus drove from far away with Helen Actually Mummy, Helen Crazy Kitchen, and Emma Science Sparks. I travelled by train from London. Mary from KeynKo who met me and deposited me back to Wivenhoe station (I could not have managed without her) and Lucy from Dear Beautiful both travelled from nearby. It was so precious to be there as a group and represent Kerry's online life which was such a big part of her world.

AND THAT BIG part of her world did her justice on Twitter where #KerryInOurHearts was still trending hours after the ceremony, which was such a pleasure for us to come out and join in on. Kerry's on and offline families REALLY came together and it was just as she would have wanted it.

Just in case any of you think you were any less important by not being there, that is so so not the case. Nick (Kerry's husband) was proudly announcing at the pub that Kerry was trending again (like on 24th November) - it was and is important to him and the family take great comfort from knowing how very loved Kerry is and was.

Several people took screen grabs of the fact that Kerry was trending. It was heart warming to see lots of tweets from @TheBoyandMe who was a great online friend of Kerry's and a fellow TEACHER.

------------------

Today it dawned on me that there are a lot of FOURS.

#Healing4Kerry trended for 2.75 hours on 24th November 2012 (and also note the 4 in the hashtag).
Kerry sadly passed on 14th December.
AND today, her funeral, burial, and thanksgiving service were on the 4th of January.

I mentioned this to her Sister in Law Louise at the pub today and wondered if she was born on the 4th, but no she was born on the 16th but then Louise quite rightly pointed out that she was born in APRIL which sees the 4 again.

It goes on.... In numerology you add up ALL of the numbers in your birth to get your destiny number.

If you add up Kerry's birth date:

16 04 1982.

As in 1+6+0+4+1+9+8+2

You get 31

which you reduce by adding 3+1 to get FOUR.

One of the negative traits of a number FOUR is being clumsy and I lost count of how many times that trait was mentioned in tributes today - like Kerry everyone had their sense of humour intact.

I will let you read this and you can see for yourself how much of it applies to Kerry: number FOUR numerology

The above link includes the following sentence for FOURS:
Your purpose is to inspire others to fulfil their fullest potential.

So the biggest thing we could do for Kerry is to fulfil our potential and to continue to be inspired by her.

I can already see her having this effect on lots of bloggers, with posts like this one by cafe bebe.


Being that the number FOUR is so significant, I suggest that when we come together as a community for a real life celebration of her life, we do it in April. A few of us discussed it today and said it would be lovely to do something with all of our children and Kerry's. It will hopefully coincide with the Easter school holidays.


I think I have rambled on enough, and it is now 01:34 a.m.

Please leave me a comment - I hope that for those of you who could not be with us today, that this post gives you an insight into the day and the service.

Nick has already said that he will put an edited version of his speech on Kerry's blog which I know you will all enjoy.

Something very moving that I heard today was that Freya who Kerry was SO very proud to write/blog for, sent her underwear and PJs several times, during her 5 long months in hospital.

Kerry now rests in peace, in their underwear and PJs, as the family recognise that she loved time in her PJs. How beautiful is that.

Simply everything about today was beautiful.

It all did Kerry justice, in a way that before today, I did not think was possible.

I have never in my life been as humbled as I was today.

Kerry will live on in all of our hearts and in her children.

She also has a Just Giving page if you would like to donate.


I will leave you with some photos that I took today on my phone that I have loaded up to G+ here.

Liska xx

The Thing About Grief

... Is that the silliest and smallest of things can set you off.

As you'll know from my last 2 blog posts @MultipleMummy sadly passed away on 14th December.
I am on the way to the thanksgiving service and have right now changed at Liverpool Street. Easily done I had thought...

Wrong!

I wandered over to platform 14 and all I could see in my mind's eye was Kerry walking away from me with a beautiful bob and a mac and bags. 

Everytime we went to London events we travelled to Liverpool Strret together and I always watched and waved as she walked to her platform and then I to mine.

Just like a movie THAT image popped into my mind unbeckoned just now and it was with a very heavy heart and HUGE lump in my throat that I retraced her steps to get on an Essex train thinking Kerry this should be you.

The thing with grief is it charges at you like a truck on the motorway and you have no time to duck out of its way before BOOM. It's like you're busy looking in the rear view mirror and it hits from the front taking you unawares.

I was feeling strong today. I was putting my grief on a shelf ready to be strong for the family.

I did not predict that a very simple meander across Liverpool Street's concourse would quite literally knock me for six...

Kerry I can see you so so clearly in my mind's eye. 

EVERY time we've said goodbye at Liverpool Street is now flashing before my eyes like some kind of cruel slideshow...

God, please look after Kerry. You've taken one of life's best treasures....

#KerryInOurHearts

Love,
Liska
Xxx

Kerry I will miss you and let you go

Multiple Daddy has just written what is probably the hardest blog post ever written.  I cannot begin to imagine his pain.  Please include him in your prayers tonight, and their babies.   

Sadly, Kerry peacefully passed away on Friday 14th December 2012.

Digesting that information was really hard.

The below post was written whilst in tears on the morning of:
Saturday 15th December 2012 

It's been in draft ever since.

*****

Since I heard the news about Kerry, late last night, I can't think of anything else.  I can't bear to think of never seeing her again and I can't bear to think of the three little ones without their Mum.  I keep focusing on Nick and reminding myself that he is an amazing Dad and person.  He'll need support though.  My heart right now sends love to all of Kerry's family and friends who must be hurting so much right now.

If you are reading this and you need anything, anything at all, I am here.  There are a great number of bloggers who will say the same.

I felt the love, warmth and character of her family and friends all the way through #Healing4Kerry - they are formidable and will get through this.  They are a tight, loving family.  They have got through the last few months by being there for each other, and will continue to be so.

But right now it's the beginning of the journey.  Grief has many aspects and each needs time.

I know it gave comfort to the family to know how very loved Kerry is in the blogging community.  She earned that love and respect, and touched so very many people.  She's left a legacy.  She's also left a beautiful blog that will be a comfort to her little ones when they're old enough to read it.  

They'll never be in any doubt that their Mummy treasured every moment with them.  For her, blogging was something she did when they were tucked up in bed.  When they were awake they had her full attention.  Kerry was a teacher before becoming a Mum, so she knew so much about education and childcare; no coincidence she co-founded Science Sparks with Emma.  

Kerry's given those 3 little ones THE very best start in life.  They've had those important formative years knowing how very much loved they are.  I wish I could squeeze all three of them right now.  I wish I lived nearer.

Oh I can't see the screen for crying.

Kerry, I am over the "why" now, and I am even over the denial.  That was what made Friday night incredibly tough.

Today, Saturday 15th December, you were the first thing I thought of when I opened my eyes this morning.

My Mum said the most appropriate poem is this - it's very well known in Ireland, I don't know about here:

Miss Me But Let Me Go

When I come to the end of the road,
And the sun has set for me,
I want no rites in gloom-filled rooms,
Why cry for a soul set free?
 

Miss me a little--but not too long,
And not with your head bowed low;
Remember the love that we once shared
Miss me--but let me go.
 

For this is a journey that we all must take,
And each must go alone.
It's all a part of the Master's plan,
A step on the road to home.
 

When you are lonely and sick at heart,
Go to the friends we know,
And busy your sorrows in doing good deeds.
Miss me - but let me go.

  
And this image below really speaks to me. Because Kerry was so original and such a bright shining star she DID stand alone and apart, but very very much stood strong as a formidable part of the community she loved.

Sadly now it is time for that community to stand together in grief.  Respectful grief. 

This is definitely a time to stand together, as was 24th November.  

Kerry definitely stood apart.  

She never ever reminded me of anyone.  

She was a leader and always inspired.  

I don't actually feel ready to say "was".  She still feels near.  She's still amongst us.  Until she passes over, from these planes, we need to continue to show her how very loved she is.  But, equally as it says above, miss her, and let her go.

Again, my heart goes out to her family as this is much easier said than done.

Kerry I want to thank you, for all the laughs we had, all the times you listened to me, and all the times you gave me just the right advice.  A long time ago you said that me, my husband and Aaron could come round for dinner.  I wish so very much that we'd put a date in the diary, but I have enough memories (and photos) to keep me warm.

You needn't have any regrets.  You lived your life to the very full.  The lesson you have now taught us is that we should do the very same.  Again, I cannot see the screen.

I'll be stronger for you.  

This was the poem that Alice wrote for #Healing4Kerry and so much of it is still relevant now:

    

We can no longer make her "well" in the physical sense, but we can speed her on her journey home, to heaven, by praying for her and her family, and releasing her.  Letting her know that everything in the physical realm is okay, for her to continue on with her spiritual journey.

For now, she is still close, so I will honour her with my thoughts and memories, and let he know how very much I love her, and will miss her.

She had a marked effect on my life and it was a very positive one.  Let's pass it on.  Let's pay it forward.  Let's be the positive role model that Kerry always was.  Again that word "was".  I don't like it.  I believe in life not death.  I also believe her journey continues.  I believe in "souls".  The physical Kerry was just one manifestation of her beauty.  The bigger part of her continues on.

I think this is my favourite photo of Kerry.  Here she is with me, and Super Amazing Mum:

A beautiful lady
A beautiful blogger
A beautiful Mum
A beautiful wife (Nick makes that clear in everything he says and does)

Goodbye beautiful Kerry.  Saying goodbye feels strange when I still feel you very near.

Liska xxx 

  

Tonight Healing Can be Found in Chocolate

At the heart of all of our blog posts, and this blog hop, is a real family, a Multiple Mummy, a Multiple Daddy, a Chilled Out Boy, a Little Madam and of course BB.  Multiple Mummy is a very busy wonderful mother of 3.

She recently had a set back which prompted this healing circle of bloggers.

The family have been deeply touched by seeing Kerry's blogging family coming together and they have found ways of staying in touch via Twitter and through comments.  Multiple Daddy was so touched by our Multiple Photos that he compiled a video of photos, with one of his all time favourites as a soundtrack: Elvis, and it has made the whole blogging community cry in awe of the beautiful family that they are, so deserving of all of our support.

I didn't know what was right for 10 p.m. tonight; I even suggested that we honour a respectful silence to allow us to do those prayers, thoughts, meditations we'd all committed too, but Mr @MultipleMummy (Multiple Daddy himself) has said we should:

"tweet or eat chocolate" If you want to tweet him to talk about Kerry and chocolate he can be found at @tractorboy1978

That's one order that is easy to carry out, or in my case, after a mad dash to the shop to buy some chocolate.

My wish all week has been to have Kerry home in time for Christmas, so of course the second I walked into the shop this box (on the left below) winked at me.  I thought right, I am holding onto those till Multiple Mummy can personally eat them.

On the left for @multiplemummy and on the right, for @newmumonline AKA me! for tonight at 10 p.m.!

I picked them up and thought eeeek I haven't followed the instruction to the letter.  He didn't say buy chocolate and stash it away for my wife.  He said EAT CHOCOLATE, so I looked around again, (but of course kept them in my basket for her) and as I can drink tea for England I quite fancied something dunkable so got the Kit Kat photographed above.

So Multiple Mummy tonight I will be drinking tea, eating kit kat, and thinking of you.

You, my dear dear blogging and real life friend.  I miss you, and want to see you again in the near future.

Get on your feet girl, there's a long queue and we all want an audience with you.

Much love,
Liska xx

P.S. Enjoy the snooze while you can, those kids will probably still be at home in their 20s ;-)

And just in case you don't "get" the chocolate connection, her love of chocolate is hinted at in this post here.

Please join the blog hop if you are yet to.  Link is here

Multiple Photos for Multiple Mummy and a Blog Hop for Healing

Every time Multiple Mummy's husband Multiple Daddy updates her blog, my heart stops. Is it good news? My heart fills to the point of bursting, and I hang on his every word. He writes very well. Thank God he is keeping us informed.

Kerry is definitely one of my favourite bloggers and has a heart as big as an ocean.  She has time, love and patience for every blogger out there, and is always thoughtful and considered whenever she says or writes anything.  She is one talented lady and even started Science Sparks with her friend Emma.  I met them (not for the first time) at Christmas in July 2011 when they were so very excited about its launch.

I first met Kerry at a Nivea event, and we've stayed in touch ever since. I miss her, I really do.  I know she would have been so very proud to have won her Mad award; luckily her hubby collected it on her behalf.

*** I personally took all of the below photos - feel free to share any more ***

Having a facial, the first time I met her:

 Large as life at Cybermummy 2011:

Cybermummy 2011.  Kerry was so so proud to have been representing (and sponsored by) Born Free.

In the lap of luxury at Boots' Christmas Press Show 2011:

"Boots" Christmas Press Show - yes Kerry did meet Fern Cotton! and I did meet Gok Wan! and he rubbed cream on me!

At Boots' Treat Street event:

Always a winner - she won that laptop bag and absolutely LOVED it!

I constantly think about the power of prayer, and more importantly what it can do, when it is synchronised and coordinated.

I read about how people are putting the recovery of Fabrice Muamba down to the power of prayer. I knew I wanted us - bloggers - to do the same, but was too scared to ask.

Tonight I have asked. Bloggers have replied.

Thankfully the idea has support.

So I ask that you hand over your blog and your heart, on Saturday 24th November and let thoughts of Kerry, aka Multiple Mummy ripple through the cyber waves.

Let us all say a coordinated prayer for her at 10 p.m. on Saturday 24th November.

Of course if you are not religious and do not pray, then medidate, or make a wish, or do what feels right for you.

Please if you can, do a dedicated blog post to her on Saturday so that she has her own HEALING CORNER of the world wide web on Saturday...

Connect with me on G+ where I have set up an event.

Share any other ideas you may have to enhance this endeavour.

Linky here:

Powered by Linky Tools
Click here to enter your link and view this Linky Tools list...

Healing 4 Kerry Pinterest board here - feel free to pin anything relevant

Hashtag for Twitter #Healing4Kerry

***

Unfortunately due to my Google Blogger "dynamic" template, the linky list is only visible if you click through, but if you grab the code whilst there, it should be fully visible on your blog as it is with Crazy With Twins, 
My Life, My Son, My Way
Science Sparks and
Mummy From The Heart

Tales of a Twin Mum has also now written a beautiful post

***

In an attempt to use every online medium possible, to raise awareness and healing, Multiple Mummy is on you tube too, here interviewing Mark Hill to find out how to make her straight hair curly.

She does of course, being the online guru that she is, have her very own You Tube channel here: Multiple Mummy You Tube channel.

Alice Baillie from My Life My Son My Way has written the below so that we can all post it on our blogs on 24th November.  Tired Mummy of Two and I did a little editing and tweaking, but the idea and the bulk of it is from Alice:

I think it is beautiful,
Liska xx