Monday 27 May 2013

You Didn't Get to See the Best of Me

Before I met you I was


Today I felt

I think you would have liked me more before but I gave my
youth to time
my waist to food
my money to rubbish
my energy to work
my patience to work
my kindness to all who asked for it or breathed near me.

Now, quite frankly, I am spent!

YOU are THE best thing in my life and yet...

You haven't found ME at MY best and THAT, my son, makes me VERY sad.

I have shown more patience to old bosses than I sometimes do to you.

You deserve my love and patience.

They didn't always.

I wish I'd met you 10 years ago, but we are where we are.  I am an older mum!

My friend has got her waist AND her energy back by simply losing weight.

Maybe, just maybe I need to do the same.

Certainly something needs to change.

The waist is too big and the bank balance is too small.

Something's gotta give

I love you son!


  1. To him though, you are the most beautiful, wonderful, amazing, fun, caring, happy, cuddly, gorgeous, best friend and mum he's ever had. So, you're actually more fantastic now than you were 10 years ago :)

  2. I could have written this about me - it's so true and so sad. And I agree with Tas D above.

  3. Echoing your words too. I know few people who don't feel this (and of they don't they're either incredibly lucky or in denial!). You are however 10 years wiser, have 10 years more experience dealing with people you needed patience for, and all will come into play as Aaron gets older. We all wish that we could be better people for our children - and for ourselves - but just by wanting that you are already a brilliant person, and he has the most loving, wonderful mother and is blessed. Xx

  4. I know how you feel :(
    I'm 42 with a 12 and 15yr old, now living with M.E after looking forward to the boys growing up and getting out together as a family to be active, biking, climbing,walking etc

    I wish they had been old enough to appreciate me when I had energy, didn't have to sleep all the time, could do everything.........

    But don't beat yourself up about it- life is what you make it, I know that now after adjusting to a chronic illness- just take the time with him to enjoy the small things in life :)

  5. I think this all the time. Beautifully put :)


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